I'll start off with this post by telling you that there's nothing I miss more than seeing and spending time regularly with my secondary school friends. They're right, it's always your secondary school you'll miss more than anything, even if it sucked because that's where you meet your true friends. The ones who become your ride or die, the people who you know will always be there for you.
There's nobody that will have a smooth ride in secondary school... because that's where we transform. Where from an adolescent, we slowly begin to mature through all our fights and troubles into a teenager, where living in the moment means more than thinking about what the consequences would be. Where we take for granted our education - we skip school. We miss classes, refuse to do our homework and eat/ text in class all we want. It's all part of the experience... one you'll learn to cherish. I know I miss mine dearly.
I thought that secondary school was tiring, boy was I wrong. I used to go home at 2-4pm every day for secondary school - now in poly, I finish earliest 3:30 every day. I reach home at timings like 7-9pm for almost every single day. But I'm not complaining, you know why? Because right now I'm living the life I've always wanted - in a way.
Polytechnic life is anything but relaxing when it comes to workload - but you find that you have bits and pieces of time here and there to simply do what you want. YouTube videos, writing, listening to the music you love while working on your assignments/ projects... it's these little things that make your life much more relaxed. Snapchats in class, tweeting your friend when you're next to each other staring at your respective screens, webcamming your friend who's two blocks away from you in your own poly - these things... they make me happy.
I know it's a pain in the ass to have to choose different outfits everyday for the people who are fashion conscious - but I feel great when I get to pick what I want to wear. Of course I still miss my IJ Blue, can't deny it. It'll always be a very big part of my life, after all - I've worn that for ten whole years of my life.
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I find myself smiling a lot nowadays because I'm meant to be where I am now, or at least I believe so. I smile when I hear the gravel crunching below the car tyres, and the sounds of milk being steamed as I happily work on the drinks at my workplace. I laugh when I want to and cry when I have to.
Though I have to admit that I do feel lost sometimes when I see my classmates hanging out with their other friends, but at the end of the day they're great people and I still have Prescillia in RP for company. We see each other almost EVERY DAY of the week and I love it. Poly has also made me start on my own fitness regime but I'm terribad at maintaining it oops.
I'm starting to find myself again, my identity and who I want to be. I felt buried during my secondary school days because I couldn't be who I wanted to be. It was a challenge. But now I feel quite free and happy. That's a very good thing that's happened to me.
I've also made lots of new friends in my class - and they all tell me one thing. I'm VERY frank. If I dislike someone, I make it apparent. If I have an opinion - I'm not afraid to voice it out. I asked them if it was a good thing and they said that it was... most of the time. And I'm glad that they've told me that I'm being frank, because that was always my intention. Though I know sometimes honesty hurts, to me, the truth demands to be felt; it demands to be told.
My weekend job also gives me a lot of enjoyment. I'm super excited for Lana Del Rey's newest album launch: Ultraviolence. Three full singles are already out and I'm frothing at the mouth waiting for the rest of her songs, Jesus. I apologize for the fact that I haven't been writing... RP is more tiring than expected.
Reflection journals, quizzes and etc are a pain in my ass. But it's good if I compare it to the workload of my boyfriend, who's taking Psychology in NP. The amount of 1.2k word essays he has to hand in seems endless to me. Plus he can't plagiarize... Copyright's such a bitch sometimes. I'm learning about these also, and apparently I have to take Media Law in year 2. (Fuck my life?)
People think that people in RP have it easy in school - they don't know about the daily presentations and such. I didn't know myself until I entered the school, which surprised me. It's quite fun though, having different groups to work with everyday. We finish our work in school, and all we have left are the RJs and quizzes. There's usually nothing else, which is why we're so free after school most of the time.
I've been getting questions on why James and I took a "short break". Honestly for the first few weeks of school, we weren't able to spend a lot of time together. Meeting new friends and all - it was a heady experience. Also I had an eyecandy then. James told me to get one if not I would die without looking at a cute boy for a while. (LOL)
Then he started picking on what I did. I hated it. He kept saying things like "Wah play League with boys SIOL", "sia la eyecandy" and etc. It made me feel really scrutinized and I felt as if I was getting suffocated. So the natural instinct - was to run. And so I did, and it hurt both of us.
But thankfully we rebounded back into something stronger. He's back to being the center of my universe - and in a good way.
